Wednesday, June 4, 2014

18 Months; Hover Craft

On May 28th, Calvin reached his newest little milestone - 18 months old. Wow... It's so hard to believe that this wonderful little guy has been here in our world for a year-and-a-half now (+ 40 weeks and 5 days, if you count the pregnancy, too).  

The time has, predictably, flown by, but at the same time, it also feels like a little lifetime.  A lifetime full of wonder, exploration and discovery, so much joy, a little bit of frustration, and a whole helluva lot of love.  

Cal is wonderful - so happy, funny, friendly, smart, sweet and ever-growing. Right now, he loves dinosaurs (dinosaur books are his favorite), playing in water, seeing birds and airplanes flying, fish swimming, and our cats playing.  

Other pastimes include learning new words all the time, starting to learn his colors and numbers, dancing, making friends with the neighbor kids, watching videos of himself on my phone, eating just about anything and everything, helping me make coffee, and, laughing as we chase him while he's running full-speed in the opposite direction that we want him to go.  He's such a little rascal!

His well-baby doctor's appointment isn't for another week, but at that time we'll get to find out how big he is now - methinks he'll definitely still be in the highest of percentiles for height and weight, as he has been since he was about 9 months old.  He started out so little, but sure has "caught up" ever since.

On a personal note, I am absolutely loving the mama thing.  Sure, there are moments where his behavior frustrates me (but that is practically a given at this age, and I know there will be a lot more of that to come), and I'm always wishing I could spend more time with him (but I'm so thankful for the wonderful care he receives every day at his awesome daycare school), but watching him grow and develop has just been so incredible.

I did recently discover, though, that perhaps I may worry/ hover too much? I'm sure it's pretty normal, especially for first-time parents, but I find myself pretty much constantly "on alert" for any situation which might present a danger to him.  We were at a neighbor's Memorial Day cookout this past Monday with 3 other families, and none of those parents kept an eagle-eye on their children at all times like I did.  But, to be fair, they're all at least on their second child (the hosting family has 4!), and only one of them is younger than Cal.  

One thing I sometimes have trouble getting past, though, is imagining calamities in my head.  I suppose I do it to bring my attention to the possible danger and to try to prepare for it if, heaven forbid, it did ever happen, but these thoughts are SO disturbing sometimes.  Obviously I can't just stick my head in the proverbial sand and ignore it all, nor can I wrap Calvin in 50 layers of bubble wrap, as much as I wish sometimes that I could, but I could really live without this near-constant anxiety.  The good thing is that I really, thoroughly relish the time I spend with Cal, so even though I (obviously) do all I can to protect him, I don't let the fear take over, so that I can't enjoy my life with him, but it's always there, at least in the background.  I suppose finding a good balance with this is something with which most all parents struggle.  It's just so strange to me to feel like this, because usually I'm quite laid back.

Regardless, I continue to be amazed every day at how completely enveloping and consuming my love is for him.  I'm forever grateful I'm one of the lucky ones who get to experience it firsthand.  I love love love my brilliant little boy, always always.

And without further ado, here are his 18-month pictures that I took this past weekend.  He had so. much. fun. at the splash pad!  We'll definitely go back soon.